Communication is the activity of communicating; the activity of conveying information that is communicated by, or to, or between, people or groups, so that it is understandably comprehended. Sometimes a couples communication is misunderstood or misrepresented. Many women will complain that men don’t listen while they are talking, and to some degree this is true. There are times when women are speaking assuming that their boyfriends or husbands are listening with attentive ears, when that’s not the case, and that assumption can lead to miscommunication. Ladies wait until you have his undivided attention before verbally conversing. Often times a couple has poor communication because they are not trying to communicate in a manner that their partner will clearly understand.
Understand that some people are better able to communicate than are others, some people may need to be more patient and deliberate in their conversations with others in order to have clearer comprehension. Communicating can become more complicated within more intimate relationships. Some peoples speech expression is not conformable with their active behavior. While others reserve pertinent content which can cause discord due to the deceptive tactics. Often when being confronted by these misrepresentations they will play the ignorant line of recall in efforts to support their erroneous innocence.
Communications will suffer between people when verbal conveyance lacks honesty. Too many people are overly consumed with attempting to meet the expectations or approval of others. So much so that they not only are dishonest with themselves, but they are also dishonest with others. It is dangerous to be concerned with what other people think of you. Don’t try to live up to other peoples expectations, don’t try to compete with others, instead realize your own unique abilities and gifts. You will only drown yourself if you say you can swim, when you can barely tread water!
Communication can break down by means of deception or willful manipulation. How many times have you heard someone say; "If you love me, you will do this for me"? When someone is trying to get over on you, it’s not healthy communication. This is especially so when they attempt to follow up with a controlling emotional comments that are plagued with poor me syndrome, or perhaps ultimatums and/or profanity when they don’t get their way. People use this type of communicating behavior because they are not held accountable, they do it because they feel that they can get away with it. This is certainly an area where communication can take on an argumentative form, when someone doesn’t take ownership of their own misbehaviors.
How many times have you heard someone say that they do not communicate well in their relationship? How can a couple communicate well if they are not being honest or if they are misrepresenting information? Healthy communication by form of honesty can be very liberating. It will reduce overall stress and avoid the suppression of feelings. To deny honesty is to deny the freedom of oneself.
Couples need to feel more comfortable opening up to each other in their communication. They should both be willing to accept and admit their shortcomings to one another without fear of condemnation. You want better communication, start on your side of the fence. Get real with yourself, so you can be real with your spouse. Take inventory of your own communicating levels so that you can better verbally express yourself and your opinions in clearer mannerisms. Your communicating abilities will rise to new levels, in your relationships and marriages, when you are honest with each other. The more honest you are, the deeper you will be able to connect. This is not to say to be blatantly honest to a level of cruelty, have some compassion……it’s saying to be honest about your own blemishes.